Memories reveal a lot about a person. As I look back through years of school there are memories that stand out. Embarrassing moments, like when Carol spilled green ink in my hair and on my favorite shirt in the fourth grade. The first time I was sent to the principle's office and I could hear my friend Linda's shaking breath over my shoulder. It made it tough not to laugh. I wrote stories on colored notebook paper that were passed around until I lost track of them.
I learned how to distract our fifth grade teacher so he would stop touching girls. I got in trouble for it often, but the look on a girls face when our eyes met after I had stopped a grown man from touching her that way was worth it. I knew and she knew I knew. There were other lessons. Like when I tossed the bat to an eighth grader during PE and she called me an immature little seventh grader. It really bothered me, but then I realized we would probably live to be really old like thirty or even forty and when I thought of it that way, she was only a year older and that year really didn't mean much. But I never tossed a bat to anyone again.
There were many memories and lessons. Teachers who believed in me when I didn't believe in myself, kids I knew to stay away from and others who would take the fall for their friends. There were days I prayed God would get me out of that school and days I didn't want to end. There were new friendships and also those that ended with moves or arguments. There was the boy I met at a party before our freshman year started. He had a crush on me. He waited on me hand and foot, but I had a boyfriend. He was cute and I liked talking to him and thought maybe one day...maybe. I was in my early twenties when I got the call that he had shot himself. I ached for days. The world stopped. I found it hard to breathe. We learn so much in those years.
There are friendships that stand out to us. I had a best friend who went through everything with me. When she was killed in a car accident, I wondered why God even put her in my life if he was only going to take her away. But I learned so much from her. Some people don't even have to think about how to treat other people, they are just good.
I have driven to and from Texas several times. The first time we took the scenic route and ended up on a gravel road in the middle of no where. My husband slammed on the brakes at one point and we all flew forward. What the...? He jumped out of the van and crouched in the road in front of it. There in the roadway was the biggest tarantula I have ever seen. Sometimes men are such boys. I could have rode right over it and been fine not even knowing it existed, but he got out to play with it for several minutes while we cooked in the dusty hot van. After several miles of driving down this gravel road, led there by a sign that read "Fresh apples" we finally got to the other end wondering where those apples were. There had been absolutely nothing for miles and miles. We learned not to travel off the main road for fruit.
In all the driving I learned when to make sure the fuel tank was full and where to stop to eat. I learned which routes were worth a little bit of "Out of the way" driving and which parts of the country to sleep through.
Many times we ask God to get us out. We all say it. I can't wait until I'm through with school. I can't wait until I find a new job. I wasted my time on that friendship. But it's the wrong turns the flat tires and the school bullies that we learn the most from. How many good stories and lessons come from a wrong turn? If a drive a cross the country is only good scenery and gentle conversation, what will you really remember?
I have recently spent a lot of time begging God to get me through this part. I don't get it. It hurts, it's miserable, can't we skip this?
God explained it like this. Your Father works it out to put you through college, because you want to become a "Good Christian". You want Papa to be proud. Through the difficult classes you white knuckle it, don't study, and just pray for each day to end. You fail and are forced to take that course again. And again you white knuckle it, don't study and pray for each day to end. It's when you finally decide, "I'm going to give this my best and no matter how many late nights, how many hours of study and how much coffee I have to drink, I am going to go into this class and learn everything the Teacher wants to teach me that things begin to progress.
Every challenge is a chance to learn. Grumbling and complaining is the language of hell. If I look back over my life there were so many lessons on each journey. The journey through school, the journey through relationships, the journey through my career, parenthood, friendships. Each lesson learned, each grade passed sends you to the next grade, the next level. Graham Cook said, "Every new level, you meet a new devil." He has to beat on every level for you to advance.
When a mountain stands between you and where you want to be you can find a comfortable place to sit at the bottom of it and pray for someone to come along and carry you over. Or you can look at it as a chance to work some new muscles. Those muscles won't get the work out if someone else carries you. You can't truly learn the lessons of someone else's journey.
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