But Jesus called the children to him and said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.
After the blog on splintered souls, I have been a little messed up. I keep getting pictures of my splintered soul poking at my children. I only slept a couple hours last night and have been emotional all day. I was feeling a little defeated, like this is so big. Scott (the speaker I was listening to) talked about how our words form God, our inheritance comes from heaven through our spiritual side and then through this splintered soul and on to our physical self. What comes out of our mouth and our actions, even though they may be good and from God, have slivers from our splintered soul. We have people parenting and preaching and mentoring and teaching with splinters.
I talked to God about this and He had me do something. I want to challenge all who read this to try it. Whether you are man or woman, baby Christian or mature, from a healthy family or a family of dysfunction, whether you believe you have been splintered or not. Seriously, you are not to manly for this.
Ask God to choose a picture from your childhood. I have one on my wall that I try to look at, but emotion bubbles up in me, because it was about the time the abuse started. Take the picture in your hands and get on your knees before God. Ask God to show you what that child needs to know. The adult you, with head knowledge, knows that Jesus loves you and that He will never leave and the adult you is the only one who can tell the child you and the child will believe it. God will start speaking through you to the little person you once were. What ever pops in your head, trust it is from God. I had to tell my little girl that He loves her and He will never leave her and that she is not bad. I forgave her and asked her to forgive me. It was hard at first, but then the words just came and God's presence did too. There I was on my knees with a picture of me at about 7 years old, saying, "Jesus loves you so much." It was amazing to me how badly I wanted her to know this.
When I felt Jesus was finished talking to her, He told me to picture laying her in His arms. Well, let's be honest, that was a little emotional too. Then I heard him in my heart in a very soft and gentle voice say, "Leave her with me."
I don't care how much testosterone you claim as your own or how "Whole" you think you are, this is healing and emotional. When my child was safe in his arms, He started telling me how she felt. How abandonment is her biggest fear. Then He started showing me how abandonment has affected all my relationships and how the enemy uses it against me. It was almost like parent's putting our child to bed for the night, together. I found a new closeness to Jesus. When I doubt He loves me, I picture Him sitting in the chair holding the little me and while He rocks her, he and I have an adult conversation about her future.
Enjoy this!!
No comments:
Post a Comment