― John C. Maxwell, The 360 Degree Leader: Developing Your Influence from Anywhere in the Organization
God and I have been having a deep discussion. It started out about salvation. The things He has been showing me, I thought did not line up with scripture, so it couldn't be Him, but then He showed me, they do line up with scripture. I believe this is a tactic He is using to get me in the word. It's always been a challenge for me to read the word, because it does not come to life for me like it does others, but lately, I can't get enough. I find myself saying things to Him like, "What does that mean? Is that taken out of context? You sound kind of mean there, God." Remember that what I write here is always about MY lessons and about MY character, so if you don't agree, well maybe I haven't caught up to you yet.
My question to Him was, "Why can a thief, hung on a cross next to Jesus, say remember me and get welcomed into heaven, but a man who casts out demons and performs miracles in His name, not get in?"
Luke 23:40-43
New International Version (NIV)
40 But the other criminal rebuked him. “Don’t you fear God,” he said, “since you are under the same sentence? 41 We are punished justly, for we are getting what our deeds deserve. But this man has done nothing wrong.”
42 Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.[a]”
43 Jesus answered him, “Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise.”
42 Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.[a]”
43 Jesus answered him, “Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise.”
Matthew 7:22-23
New International Version (NIV)
22 Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ 23 Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’
God took me back to my childhood. Confession time here. I went through a streak when I was about fourteen when I hated - well I hated everyone and everything. I was so full of anger that I know now was from all that had happened to me. I walked around with a "Screw you" attitude, on the outside. On the inside, I was scared. For instance, one night when a friend and I wanted to go some place that was too far to walk, we took... okay we stole a truck and a gas card to go with it. She had no fear that I could see. I tried to portray the same attitude, but on the inside, I knew it was wrong and I knew I would probably be tortured for years, beat beyond recognition and thrown in prison for life. I also believed that was what I deserved.
God told me it's about the heart. I was sorry. All those people who get tired of my black and white, all or nothing belief system will be happy to hear the Lord is showing me (in a way) there is some gray. What may be acceptable for one is not for another. For instance, I have asked people (in the tone of a ticked off child) "Doesn't it bother you to watch that show?" Why? Because God won't allow me to watch it. Seriously, I have not had cable for over a year and God still says "Nope". It doesn't really bother me except for football, but I'm finding out even that can be forgotten. So why am I convicted over a TV show and the next person isn't? I believe it's priorities. God has a list of things He is working on in each of us, and maybe TV was a higher priority on the list He has for me than the next person. Maybe that's because I am an addict. Maybe I let the stuff get into my heart more than the other person. Not totally sure about this, but it's a thought.
The thing God showed me though was all about repentance. There was a man I worked with who always said, "Easier to ask forgiveness than permission." Yep, it never set well with me. That's not getting your way, that's taking it. That is putting grace above love. That's saying, "I will do whatever I want and God's grace will cover me." I think we depend on His grace more than we depend on His love. We find it easier to trust Him to give us grace than to trust Him to love us. To trust him to love us is to say, "Lord, shine your light into the darkness of my heart and change me." Will it hurt to much? Will He leave me in the middle of it? Yes, He brought me back to the smoking thing. I wasn't excited. It's my attitude about it. I truly do not want to smoke, but am I laying it at His feet or holding onto it and saying "God you can have everything, except this."
I have been told in the past, "God does not talk to us like that." when I have told others of my conversations with Christ. I'm sorry, but that is how He talks to me. Sometimes when I am overwhelmed or just out of it, I will ask Him to tell me something, anything He wants me to know. It's always amazing. Last night, lying in bed, stumbling over the garbage in my head, I asked, "Will you tell me something you want me to know?"
"I have to take down some trees." Not exactly what I wanted to hear, but because He has been having me read in Daniel for months now, I knew He was talking about the story of Nebuchadnezzar. He said it was about arrogance. I argued, (yes, I haven't grown past a little arguing) that what I saw was really insecurity. Then he said, "Arrogance and insecurity are one in the same - they both put you before Me. Both insecurity and arrogance say I know better than You Lord, I don't trust You and I must protect myself, because I don't trust You to know what is best. Arrogance says, I know better and I will storm forward with my own plan, while insecurity says, I am afraid You don't have my back, so I will turn and flee, instead of trusting that I have the authority You have put in me that makes the enemy flee." He went on to tell me that I was looking at arrogance and insecurity through earthly eyes instead of spiritual eyes. If it keeps you from getting closer to Him, it has to go. Too many people in this country are spoiled. They expect and they want the glory that belongs to Him. Too many people have forgotten that He put them where they are and He can take them down. This country is in trouble. Again He spoke of looking for a people He can trust. People who will listen and obey.
He used the illustration of a new born baby. How we come to Him totally dependent for everything. As we grow and learn to walk, we fight for independence. It's when we become prideful that we fall. Pride is the root of rebellion and rebellion is the opposite of submission. True brokenness means completely submitted. It's crazy how He brings all that He has been showing me into a lesson. Rebellion is a demand for control. Rebellion is witchcraft.
1 Samuel 15:22-23
New King James Version (NKJV)
22 So Samuel said:
“Has the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices,
As in obeying the voice of the Lord?
Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice,
And to heed than the fat of rams.
23 For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft,
And stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry.
Because you have rejected the word of the Lord,
He also has rejected you from being king.”
As in obeying the voice of the Lord?
Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice,
And to heed than the fat of rams.
23 For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft,
And stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry.
Because you have rejected the word of the Lord,
He also has rejected you from being king.”
The way I understood what He was explaining to me, rebellion is to control what should be submitted. Even self control is wrong, unless it's through the Holy Spirit. So, when a person lies and will not take correction, ask forgiveness and repent, they are basically practicing witchcraft. We have to take responsibility. We have to have a heart that yearns to do right in the eyes of God. That is truly loving Him with all of our heart, soul, and mind. Grace is for those times when we mess up. We all mess up. But to live day to day with no conscience, no heart for what is right, that's when God says, I never knew you. Somebody who is not broken by their own sin, someone who doesn't acknowledge their sin, who really wants to change to please God because they love Him, really needs to look at this a little closer.
God does not beat us up about our sin. He has never made me feel bad. He sits with open arms, inviting me (and you) to come to Him, totally surrender my will, open my heart, and ask Him to shine His light in there so He can change me.
He talked to me about this country by taking me back to a time when my mom would get really angry at me and my sister and spank us. We did what any normal kids at that age would do, we laughed. We laughed until she laughed with us. The sad part is that is what we are doing to God, but He is not laughing. He explained how patient He is. How He has warned and warned, but people are not listening. As a nation, even in our justice system we are letting people go who really should be locked up. They are laughing at that justice system. We hear it all the time, how ridiculous the sentences are for some criminals. They aren't really paying consequences. Discipline doesn't exist in this country like it should, just look at all the debt. As far as God goes, there are even religions who have taken hell and judgment out of the bible and God is not happy. If you go back and read the bible people are held accountable. Look at Moses for instance. He did a great thing for God. It took his whole life, but did he see the promise land?
Parent's who do not discipline end up with spoiled children. Church leaders who do not discipline end up with an unrepentant congregation. Grace and Mercy are awesome and I am so thankful for them, but it's about the heart. Did we take the prophets out of the Church because we don't want to hear the warnings? I know we are supposed to speak through love, but sometimes love hurts.
I woke this morning hearing the same sentence over and over, "Where have all the mentors gone?" There was a time after my dad left that my mom disappeared, dealing with her own pain. I am not pointing a finger at my parents, I get where they were and what they were dealing with. I am only bringing this up to make a point. My parents weren't disciplining me, I was running wild and free. So were many of my friends. The only thing I heard from adults was judgment for my behavior, even though they were not asking me what was going on in my life or trying to be any kind of example. I really wanted someone to care enough.
Are we doing this as a Church family? Are we mind reading (assuming), and judging others behavior without sitting down and having a conversation with them, mentoring them? Are we mentoring or throwing the kitchen sink at them, when we don't like what they say? This country is full of rebellious teenagers and even adults, is the Church too? I have mentors, but I know what it's like not to have them. And even though I learn a lot from them and can't wait to sit down and talk to them about what God is showing me, I still miss my original mentor. Because there is a bond we can't forget. Mentorship is a special relationship, it's an important relationship and even when we have to hear things we don't want to hear, even though we don't always agree, it's a relationship that has meaning. God chooses our mentors for a reason, for several reasons. I remember Him telling me over and over when I questioned out of rebellion and lack of understanding, why He chose my first mentor, for me, "It's an uncommon friendship for an uncommon time."
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